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Hii Iim Narzz, I'm 12 yrs ulddd. I dunt lyk gaiz bt i supurt gaiz rite idk y. umg its ure nut ur getit ryt. Im yung so fak it lul i lurv 2 ptray ard, jus luk @ my sw&g. h8z cn eat my sh1t cuz i am purfect. iggay assezasslia is my lyf xoxo txt it
This video pisses me off because everything about it is perfect. It’s extremely well shot and composed. Every decision that went into it from the choreographed sunglasses throw to the bass boosted Nickelback seems deliberate and incapable of improvement.
Nothing I ever make will be better than 12 second long shitpost.
me, crouched down in front of my tomato plants, examining a pattern of insect bites on their lower leaves: i’m going to fucking kill whoever did this. i’m going to kill them for you. don’t worry, babies. I’m going to murder every single son of a bitch who ever got a mouthful of you. they’ll die screaming
my neighbor, who i did not realize was also outside, standing behind the fence: oh! okay. you’re talking to the plants. okay.
the funniest thing we do to alligators is duct tape their mouths shut when we need to handle them. imagine being a creature so ancient and undefeatable that you haven’t changed in thousands of years being rendered basically defenseless by a piece of plastic
I love how humans have literally not changed throughout history like the graffiti from Pompeii has people from hundreds of years ago writing stuff like “Marcus is gay” “I fucked a girl here” “Julius your mum wishes she was with me” and leonardo da vinci’s assistants drew dicks in their notebooks just for the banter and mozart created a piece called “kiss my ass” so when people wish for ‘today’s generation’ to be like ‘how people used to’ then we’re already there buddy we’ve always been
The Hagia Sophia has inscriptions that were considered sacred for centuries until they were deciphered in the 70s to be Nordic runes saying “Halfdan wrote this”
my old english prof told us that theres a cave in Scandinavia where a viking gratified some runes like 14 feet up on the wall and when they finally reached it all it translated into was “this is very high”
Ancient Shitposting
Now on the History Channel
‘People have literally just always been people’ is genuinely my favorite fact about the world
“Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.” - Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106 BC - 43 BC
so not nearly as old but, this is a 12th century stave church in lom, norway (one of less than 40 left in the world)
it’s hard to see, but in the top left corner of this photo where the light comes in from the window, there’s a runic inscription
these photos show it more clearly, it’s easier to see in person. so of course one of the people i was travelling with asked what it said, and we were told it basically translates to:
“on this day, I climbed to this point, in the corner of the church”